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Bye Bye Tantrums!

How does your little baby turn into a tantrum throwing toddler? More importantly how can you stop this before the tantrums take over!?

Tillie is just so adorable but without warning would throw herself on the floor; she was increasingly banging her head when she was cross and just whining and crying and seemed very frustrated and increasingly agitated. This obviously unsettled me too as I spend all my day playing and reading to her, perhaps giving her a little too much attention! She was seeing me more as a playmate rather than her Mummy and I was at risk of losing my happy little girl and letting these tantrums take over!

I had to put a stop to it before she hurt herself banging her head to as every day the tantrums were increasing and I was failing miserably at trying to stop them!
This is what I tried to begin with:

1) Telling her to stop banging her head
2) Distracting her
3) Holding her on my knee and talking to her calmly until she calmed down (and hoped that I didn't have my teeth knocked out when she attempted to head-butt me!)
4) I tried shocking her by raising my voice, but I didn't like it and Tillie didn't respond at all!

It was getting to the stage where changing her nappy became a nightmare, I often ended up chasing her round the room before giving up as she was that angry she would lay there banging her head and shouting "NO “until she eventually wriggled free.

I wanted to concentrate on her good behaviour rather than on her tantrums -

THIS IS WHAT WORKED FOR US!

Tillie had her breakfast and we had the usual morning struggle when it came to getting dressed, I explained that we were going to make something very special so she took my hand and followed me into the kitchen where there was a bottle waiting.

She carried the empty bottle into the lounge where I had stickers waiting for her to put on the bottle to make it look pretty.
I told her that we then had to go outside and get some stones, so we took a little pot and filled it with stones that we found outside, which she absolutely loved doing.
I thanked her for helping me and told her that every time she was a good girl and listened to mummy and daddy she would get to put a stone in her bottle.....So far so good!

It was then nappy changing time! I reminded her that if she laid still and listened to the story I was about to tell her then she could put a stone in her bottle - she laid there beautifully, she then held my hand and took me through to her bottle and was so excited shouting "i did it i did it".

We had the rest of the day tantrum free and she ended up having 6 stones that day for eating her meals beautifully, listening when I asked her to do something.

The next morning Tillie woke up and she was a different child she was so well behaved she wasn't stressed or agitated, she remembered straight away about the stones, we haven't had a tantrum since. She is just so proud of her stones and bottle.

Tillie is too young to realise that when it gets to the top she will get a reward as to her it is a big reward to just put a stone in there and collect more in her pot! But the rewards I will give her are a trip to the park, go and feed some ducks, or visit my sister's farm to see the baby chicks.

I cannot believe how much this has changed us as a family as I really didn't notice how much it had started to have an effect on us all, we began to dread going out in case the tantrums started as she really is a beautiful little girl. Me and Nick would snap at each other as I would be trying one method to try and stop them and he would just go and start playing with her which was almost rewarding her so the poor little girl was confused.

The other method I use to distract her if I sense a little tantrum coming on is to tell her that her toys are asleep and that we have to be quiet so that we don't wake them - this also works a treat and she forgets what she was cross about.

I would love to hear which methods have worked for you! Please remember to follow me x

Comments

  1. It was when I lowered my voice to an uber low monotone that it finally clicked with her that I will win! :-) Today she woke and has been an angel all day!
    --KimD
    The Mom Standard

    ReplyDelete
  2. I like this idea. I think we can adapt it. We have fewer tantrums these days but struggle to get her dressed in the morning, and ironically in her PJ's at night

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  3. this sounds great! Can I ask how old she is/was when you started doing this, just wondering if my little girl is old enough for it, because I'm wondering if it will help with her giving up her dummy and also using a cup instead of a bottle for her milk - she's 20 months.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Thank you! Tots is 17 months old, she is very grown up for her age though. It has made such a difference, getting ready to go out and nappy changes are a breeze now! Good luck and please let me know how it works, as unfortunately it didn't work for The Moiderer's little girl, but i think she is slightly older.

    It was lots of fun decorating the bottle too!

    ReplyDelete
  5. What a nice idea :) Glad it worked for you! Luckily Elle hasn't got to the tantrum stage yet! (14 months)

    ReplyDelete
  6. That's serious, dear! She can seriously hurt herself if she bangs her head onto something. Broken teeth would be the least of your problems. Try to keep her calm and she will eventually outgrow her tantrum days.

    ReplyDelete

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